Often times, both women and men get a little too comfortable after they have gotten married, and don’t think they have to do the things they did to get their mate to keep their mate. For instance, some woman get so caught up in their busy schedules and with taking care of the children that they stop fixing themselves up. They throw on some frumpy clothes, throw their hair in a pony tail, don’t bother to put on any makeup or jewelry, and they just go about their day. It doesn’t take any more than about ten minutes to throw on a hint of makeup and put your hair in a cute style. I never did understand why women think it is ok to let themselves go after they have become wives or mothers. I completely understand that juggling a full time job, ensuring that the house is in order, and taking care of your man and children can be exhausting, but you only feel as good as you look. There have been moments when I am completely beat; however, I MAKE myself throw on some makeup on my way to work and step out of my car looking fierce honey! LOL... I just refuse to have my husband asking himself, “what in the world happened to her?” Or for others to wonder why in the world he chose me. No ma’am. And I just genuinely enjoy making myself up and looking nice. As a woman, we have all had one of those days when we don’t feel as attractive as we usually do. On those days, I make it a point to throw on a nice dress or pencil skirt with a trendy blouse and some pumps and call it a day. That always brings my confidence several notches up. The next time you are feeling a little less confident, down or blah, try it, and watch how great it makes you feel. That confidence you feel on the inside will have no choice but to exude on the outside. And you will be ready to conquer whatever may come your way.
I will never forget a sermon that my reverend once taught. It completely changed my perspective of marriage and relationships. He emphasized the importance of not letting yourself go when you are married. He suggested that we should fix ourselves up before we leave work and are on our way home to see our spouse - ensuring that we look our best for him. Similar to the manner in which we used to prepare for dates with our spouse before marriage. And it’s true. Why should we spend so much time primping before we leave the house so that we can look good for strangers while we walk around the house with a scarf on our head and not a lick of makeup on? Ensuring that you keep yourself snatched at all times will be attractive to your spouse and will keep the sparks flying between the two of you. It will remind him of how blessed he is to have married such a beautiful, resilient, and confident woman. I understand how exhausting and how demanding our Iives can be, but it can literally take less than five minutes to put on some earrings, comb your hair, put on some lipgloss, and throw on a cute top with your yoga pants. There is absolutely no excuse.
It is also important to continue to do the things that you used to do when the two of you first met. For example, if you used to cook every night for him, don’t stop now that you are married. And don’t stop working out and let yourself go just because you’re married. If you were fit and trim when you met him, try to maintain that fit and trim figure. Even with hectic schedules, it is possible to find some time to do some sort of physical activity. I personally, work out during my lunch hour because I wake up too early to work out before I head to work in the morning and when I get home, I am so focused on what I need to do around the house that I cannot even thinking about a workout. Working out has an abundance of advantages, which I will cover in a later blog specially about fitness and your busy schedule. Please be sure to keep an eye out for that content.
By no means am I suggesting that your husband will love you any less if you do not do the things that I have mentioned; however, it will certainly make a positive impact on your marriage if you do decide to make these small changes. Give it try. What have you got to lose? ;)